I'll wait for you...forever

It's time for my stalker post of the week/day/hour, etc. Here's the topic: Zach Braff & Natalie Portman. And the question: Is it true? Are they dating? My heart breaks a little b/c if he's with Bonnie Sommerville, it's like I still have a chance. B/c she's just a TV guest star glorified by a relationship with the love of my life (or of the moment). But Natalie Portman...I mean, it's f*cking Queen Amidala. No matter how much the movies suck, she's still a Queen, she still had her white jumpsuite onesie ripped into a Britney Spears-esque outfit during a penultimate battle sequence, causing my friend Walter to cheer a little bit. And me to let out a "Are you kidding me?" to the aggressive shushing of the dedicated fan filled audience. Okay, went off on a bit of a tangent...basically what it comes down to is Portman trumps Sommerville. Always. And where does that leave me?
Reagan